10 September 2013

still trying

I am a survivor,
a beginner
a wisher of impossible things

I have dreams I want to see come true
and nightmares I want to set on fire,
each ember a shadow of the mirrors of the darkness
that traps my soul

I am a destroyer
I bring tragedies to all that once was me

help me to set free,
the butterflies that adorn my arms and legs and whispers
born of pain and sadness

my attempts at a cure
my sad, meager attempts at distractions

I stand, I weep, I crawl, I try to stand
before you
born again, transformed

I am my faults
I survive again, and again
painless and beloved as they try
to make me believe

they say that I am a success of my failures
but I know
that each moment

I just

      I want to try